one step at a time

Meet my friend, Dale.  Dale is a seventy something year old man who runs over a hundred miles a week or sometimes all at once.  Yes, Dale is a real person.   I met him three years ago, not long after we moved to Hawaii, while running the paths around here at the lagoons.  He runs from his home in Makakilo, around town and down to the beach. He greets just about everyone that comes along his path.   I consider him my running spiritual guru.  He always has some advice to share with me whether its about shoes, nutrition,  or an upcoming running event, all in quick second spurts as we meet each other along our paths.  Or sometimes we share a quick hi if we're running in opposite directions, and then he shouts 'I'll catch you on the go around!' when he passes by.  The other day he told me he was on his fourth day of running twenty miles in a row.  He wears feathers in his running hat.  He even gave me shoe trinkets to attach to my shoe laces calling them special power boosts.  Yes, Dale is certainly one of a kind.  Running is truly a form of meditation for him as he's always on a quest to find the perfect  pace that will lead him to discover nirvana. He simply enjoys.    He is my true master and obi-wan of running!
After I saw him on my run one Saturday morning, I was off to my errands and tasks to do, took my shower, light cleaning around the house, made a quick breakfast, put a load of laundry in then off   to get my grocery shopping done early to beat the crowds. I had to get everything done in just the right time so I'd be able to get Micah off to his swim class in time.  Just one little set back in my schedule could  ruin my whole day. As I was pulling out of the Costco parking lot happy to be right on schedule, who do I see running across the lot? The master himself, Dale still running four hours later!  If I was too focused on my own schedule, I just might have missed him and the opportunity to say hi.  What a juxtaposition, I thought of two very different lives.  Here I was running around in the hustle and bustle in my day, and there was Dale, still running simply just for fun.  Sure I was a little envious of that care free spirited life and granted he is retired and does not have the responsibilities like that of a full time working mother of three but that's not the point.  I think it was to show me just how much of my life is comprised of schedules and agendas and if something throws off my plan how that can spark my temper and frustration.

God reminds me to run my own race marked before me.

Sometimes I get so easily overwhelmed by to do lists, tasks, and agendas.  Or just day to day work. Even as I sit here right now, just before I began  writing this, I felt overwhelmed  and so unmotivated.  Who's going to read it anyway? or really benefit. I  know I only write for an audience of one, my God and savior.  I know we are supposed to trust Him to do all things but therein lies the struggle.  How much of our plans really matter? and when does God take over?  How much am I relying and trusting in God than rather than my own abilities and plans? 


My best indicator to answer this question is how much I lost my temper when things don't go my way.  This also tells me how much I'm at rest. 

Then Jesus said, Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest.  Matthew 11:28

We all need rest physically, but we also need rest spiritually.   We rest when we trust God that He is in control and trust Him to provide us with ALL our needs.

That is why the verse above gives me some kind of comfort especially for a task oriented person like myself.  It tells me that God still uses our organized ways, agendas even for His good.    There is something good in all of it.  He uses us in all of it.  Its ok to make our plans, but we must first trust in him.  
Likewise, we can't just sit back and do nothing.  Sometimes we have to get off our butt and run our own race.  And if I need my hand dandy to do list to do it,  so be  it.  I will trust God to help me through it and if it all does not get done, its ok, because He is in control! 


Its so comforting to know, that when plans don't go as WE planned, God will take care of it and we can come to him  with all of it and rest. 

Family update: There is nothing like celebrating the birth of two of your children in one month to feel the whoosh (whoosh? I guess that is a word) of time passing by you.  My oldest, Andrew turned 15 on April 3rd.  He has such a heart for God.  He inspires me!  He is active in his church youth group and growing into a respectful young man. 
Micah, my youngest, turned 7 on April 8.  He no longer needs me to hold his hand or walk him to his class room when I drop him off in the morning.  In fact the other day, he asked me to drop him off a block from school just so he can 'walk' to school.   I obliged to this request for independence of course keeping a watchful eye on him the whole way.  He enjoys his swim lessons, building lego toys and despite all the electronic devices present in this day and his life, he still plays imaginary games by himself with his own toys (love that!) Nathanael, my second oldest has come such a long way in his studies, struggling in the beginning of the school year, now coming out with all Bs on his report card.   I confess, we share a guilty pleasure for the 'Stranger Things' and just finished watching the first 2 seasons on Netflix, after homework was done of course.  And my wonderful husband leads our pack just like you see  in the picture above  as our  family journeys together in this thing called life.
Although he is not officially in the law enforcement field, he continues to be a mentor and friend  to his academy buddies as they face the daily challenges in that under appreciated line of work.  They've  become great friends, like brothers.  I ask that you pray for him as he is struggling from a shoulder injury.
And me, I continue on my 12 step celebrate recovery bible study,  learning about my past and how it contributed to my bad habits like my temper and stress. 
And so I might not be able to run miles for hours and hours like my friend Dale, but I can at least reach for  that  same pace  placing all my trust in Jesus, even the agendas, grocery lists, chores.  God cares about all the details of our life, no matter how big or small.  And everything we do can be a worship to him, even the laundry.

This blog is dedicated to another awesome seventy something year old my mom who celebrates her  birthday today.  She also being a working mom of three as a great master of schedules and to do lists and giving it all to God.  She is such an inspiration!  Happy birthday mom!
-love your daughter, Janette aka hopeful girl.
sober for 2 years,nine months, 2 weeks and 4 days. hopeful for another day more.